A verb that deletes specific information in any way as to how, when or where is called in NLP Unspecified Verb. Unspecified Verbs are verbs (the doing part) in a sentence that don’t fully describe the action taking place. They don’t give enough information to let you know what is going on for them. People usually fill in the gap with their own experience – called Mind Reading. When people use unspecified verbs, all it means is that they do not have the descriptive way of representing what they mean and/or understand.
We often talk about this mythical group of people called “they” or other groups. “They won’t like me”, “They are better than me”, “Employers don’t like too many jobs on a resume”, and “Men don’t like smart women”. This kind of thinking can limit us when we respond to “them” rather than real specific people. NLP Lack of Referential Index.
We can also stereotype people when we don’t recognize that we are really talking about 2 actual people we know. “Those Dutch are greedy”, “Those kind of people are no good” and so on. Examples to scan for and questions you can ask to explore this pattern in more depth:
- I agree with that – You agree with what do you agree, specifically?
- Four of those are good – Which four are you referring to and from which group?
- Ewww, throw that one out! – Throw which one out? NLP Lack of Referential Index.
- I believe this goes with that – Which goes with which other one?
- So they say! – Says whom, specifically? NLP Lack of Referential Index.
Exercise for you today is twofold: One, master your scanning mechanism for Lack of Referential Index. Two, reread the past two days and start to listen to conversations on the street, in the supermarket, on the radio, in stores, wherever you are, you start to listen to the learnings of the past few days. Remember that the world is your playground and look for what is not there! NLP Lack of Referential Index.
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In NLP Comparative Deletion is any statement wherein a comparison is implied or given. But where one side of the comparison is omitted. When you accept a statement without understanding what’s behind it, you get stuck. Many “self esteem” issues come from deciding someone is better or more worthy at a general level rather than questioning the standard. “Better at what specifically?” If you don’t know what the standard is, how can you improve or disregard it?
Any statement with missing of deficient information is a simple deletion. In NLP Simple deletions are where part of the meaning are left out or lost. You can notice them in sentences with it and that. Also when referring to missing descriptions (adjectives) – as in “Please give me the report.”, can be challenged with the question “Which report do you want, specifically”. Assuming that you know which category or thing the person means can get you into trouble. You think you know which report the boss wants when she says “Get me a report on it straight away”. Filling in her request blindly and delivering the report will result in a mind read, cause you have to fill in the information for “it”. Mind reading fills in the deletion gaps.
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